“Life.com”

Facing New Realities #1
Colossians 3:1-17
Sunday September 17, 2006

Today we’re launching a new series called “Facing New Realities.” You can see from the schedule of messages in your bulletin and on our website that we’re going to spend the next few weeks looking at the changes going on in a world where change is accelerating exponentially. We’re going to see what challenges those changes pose to us, and what Jesus Christ and the Bible have to say about the promise of life that God has for us in the midst of this change.

So this morning let’s start with the reality of living in the age of Life.com. I’m not here to preach total abstinence from the internet… though I can testify that my mental, emotional and spiritual health was improved by my involuntary fast from e-mail and the blogs while I was in Uganda! The reality is that virtually everyone here is plugged into the net as a matter of necessity in the workplace or at school. Someone estimated in 2001 that this broad network of computers and information they make available was used by 100 million people in the USA alone! I can’t imagine what the number might be today! And it is growing exponentially throughout the world… I did read an article from the Journal of Computer Resources Management where experts tracking internet traffic concluded that the traffic is NOT doubling every 3-4 months—it’s only doubling EVERY YEAR! Imagine that! Another article I read predicted that in 2007 e-commerce will remain the fastest growing segment of the US Retail marketplace with a projection of $190.9 BILLION in sales from e-businesses to customers!

We need to recognize how the internet has improved the world

Socially: increased communication: I can be in touch with my Bishop, with Noah, and with friends in Uganda half-way across the world in the click and send of a button..what used to take weeks or months now takes seconds

Educationally: accessible learning: Distance learning is becoming a reality for millions of people! For the first time in history, adults all over the world are able to pursue advanced studies and knowledge without leaving their homes or jobs!

Politically: the availability of facts, voting records of representatives, and up to the minute information about the issues that matter make for more informed decision making and participation in our political processes; and

Economically: maximizing competition: Because of wireless technology, people in even the most remote places of the earth can have instant access to the world market for their crops—no longer at the mercy of unscrupulous traders taking advantage of their ignorance.

You can meet new people who will enrich your life. You can find people who share similar interests or passions or backgrounds. The internet can help you find the person you are to marry! So the good news is the internet can make us all smarter, richer, better connected, and more informed.

But we also need to recognize the dark side of cyberspace:

Bored homemakers who get hooked into and obsessed with chat rooms; husbands who find themselves ensnared in cyberaffairs; young people who get hooked on online games, and day traders who get violent when their losses mount.

The dark side of cyberspace is the substitution of “virtual reality” and “virtual relationships” for the real thing-- the relationships that God wants to give us on his terms, in his good creation. Virtual relationships have a unique dynamic that is different even from writing letters(4 unique aspects)

In virtual relationships, Anonymity is high: The internet offers the ultimate form of being able to remain anonymous. When I sign on, nobody knows anything about me that I don’t want to tell them. And that means I can be anybody I want to be. And that means there is a tremendous potential for deception. The Bible tells us what we know by intuition: “our hearts are desperately wicked, and who can know them”. We are already inclined to deception from birth—but when you take away the normal safeguards against deception through the internet, literally all hell can and will break loose.

Secondly, in virtual relationships Accountability is low. In normal 3-D life, we have built in accountability that helps guide our behavior. We usually have a network of relationships at work, in the neighborhood and in our extended family. And what that means is that if I mistreat you, our broader circle of friends is going to know about that and call me into account for it. But on the Net there almost no accountability…Anonymity is high, accou ntability is low, and there’s no eyes locking onto mine watching me. Let me give you an example-- “The Boss Screen” (with one click of the mouse you can switch to a fake screen that makes it look like your working on a work project)…

The third unique dynamic of virtual relationships is what some experts call “Disinhibition”: the tendency to say deeply personal things to anonymous strangers on the Net, secrets and things that you and I would normally never share with someone until we got to know and trust them face-to-face over time. In fact, one expert who surveyed thousands of internet users found that 45% of all internet users and 80% of people who have a kind of addictive relationship to the internet experience disinhibition on a regular basis. People use language that they would never normally use because facial expressions, tone of voice and body language are all off the field of play. So it feels like anything goes. It feels exhilarating—but exhilaration gives way to danger, and danger can give way to insulting and even violent language.

High anonymity, low accountability, and increased inhibition finally lead to the fourth dynamic of virtual relationships: Accelerated intimacy. When facial expressions, tone of voice, and body language are no longer on the field of play—when you no longer actually see people at work, in their relationships, in friendships, with their extended family, at church—you’re free to project wonderful qualities onto that person you’re writing because they are a blank slate. Because you’re not looking another person in the eye, you’re free to write very intimate things that you wouldn’t otherwise share until much much later in 3-D…the kinds of things you would only write in a diary or a journal. And when intimacy gets fast-tracked in an environment that microwaves relationships and lacks so many of the safe guards that make 3-D relationships move slowly—it has the potential for major heartbreak.

And some of you have experienced that, and some of you are experiencing that right now. When I googled “Internet addiction” I found 25,100,000 entries—and th first was the Center for Internet Addiction recovery which specializes in the treatment of obsessive chat rooms, cybersexual affairs…

LET ME PAINT A DIFFERENT PICTURE FOR YOU: It’s on the canvass of creation that includes you and me, and it’s painted by the God who made you and me for the purpose of authentic friendships—with God first, and with others. Relationships that are real, and rich, and deep, and where feelings are not microwaved …where instead trust is allowed to grow in the context of mutual love between people face-to-face who are seeking to love each other in the same way that Jesus Christ loved people.

God hard-wired into you and me the hunger to love and be loved, to know and be known. God wants you and me to know intimacy. And if we don’t get that hunger fed in God honoring and productive ways-- if we don’t learn to love others and be in relationships on the terms that God showed us in and through Jesus Christ-- then we will feed that hunger in ways that are self-destructive, pain numbing, and God-defying.

So in the moments that remain in this talk, and as we launch this new series, let me give you three challenges about how to pursue authentic friendships and authentic community in ways that will honor God AND develop your life. The first challenge is this:

1. Get deep with God-- above everything else. Read this with me:

1 You have been raised to life with Christ, so set your hearts on the things that are in heaven, where Christ sits on his throne at the right-hand side of God.
2 Keep your minds fixed on things there, not on things here on earth.
3 For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God.
4 Your real life is Christ and when he appears, then you too will appear with him and share his glory! Colossians 3:1-4 (Good News Translation)

Paul talks about three things here: Your heart (will, spirit, action center), your mind (thoughts and feelings) and your whole life. It’s a picture of our whole lives completely caught up and infused with the life of Jesus Christ, living in us—hearts, minds, choices, feelings—thinking the way Jesus thought, living the way Jesus lived, serving the way Jesus served others, loving the way he loved others, and even feeling the same feelings he felt! All because he has died for us, and when we have surrendered our lives to him, our life is so caught up in his that we literally live our lives—heart, mind and choices—as he would live them if he were us!

But as I look at my life and yours here in NoVa, I’m convinced that we’re falling short of Christ’s plan for us! As I compare the way we live and the way Ugandan Christians live, I’m convinced that we are living sub-normal Christian lives, and starving ourselves relationally, because we are trying to squeeze Jesus into whatever space remains in our overprogrammed lives. We are driven by mortgages, debt, the expectations of others, careers, and the mistaken assumption that MORE INFORMATION FROM THE WEB will make us happier, wiser and healthier. We are driven by the pace of these expectations and needs instead of being driven by Jesus Christ and his life in us first, and letting him take care of the rest of the details. (Mt 6:33)

But Jesus won’t be squeezed into the leftovers of your life and mine. As Paul says, he wants our hearts, our minds, and our whole lives, and nothing less. Those are the terms on which he will give us relationships with himself and others that are rich and real. And if we insist on squeezing him into the leftovers, he will not override our choices. He will let us live with our drivenness and superficiality and emptiness until we can stand it no longer.

Let me put it to you this way in a question: How many of you feel like what you really need in your life is to be bombarded by more information? You just feel like you’re not getting nearly enough facts thrown at you, and you’d love to have an information river more intense than the one you have right now? I’ll bet there would not be many hands that go up…

Now let me ask you this: How many of you would like a source of love, acceptance, and encouragement that is inexhaustible—a river that will never dry up? How many of you would like a source of wisdom beyond yourself to help you make your decisions about job, family, marriage, raising kids, and what you are supposed to do with your life? How many of you would like a river that will wash away your sins, cleanse you from the inside out, and heal those things that you just can’t change on your own—raise your hands…

God knows that, and that’s why he doesn’t give up on you and me—why he continues to remind us through people like Paul in Col 3 that we have a river of life IN CHRIST JESUS… It’s right there, and all we have to do is step into it!

SO How can we go deep with God? Paul wraps up the challenge the same way he gegan—by inviting you and me to begin with our hearts, our minds, and the the choices we make in our lives…

15 Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful… EX: Prayers at Bishop and Lovey’s everyday--with grateful hearts, peace and love…
16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. EX: Bible study fro 5-7pm with young people in Ruwenzori… and how that translates into the way they treat each other

17 And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. Colossians 3:15-17 NIV

EX: Thesis of Choose the Life: Believe, Live, Love, Serve, Lead as Jesus did… result: real friendships and community. WHY? Because if you get deep with God you will get deep with others!

2. Get real with yourself

Which means two things: first, honesty before God…read this together:

5 You must put to death, then, the earthly desires at work in you, such as sexual immorality, indecency, lust, evil passions, and greed (for greed is a form of idolatry).
6 Because of such things God’s anger will come upon those who do not obey him.
7 At one time you yourselves used to live according to such desires, when your life was dominated by them. Colossians 3:5-7 Good News Translation

Let’s focus for a moment on sexual immorality and sexual brokenness. Sexual immorality and sexual brokenness are sins that are as old as the Fall. There is nothing new there at all. But what IS new is the 24 hour a day opportunity to gratify any sexual fantasy or fetish no matter how bizarre and destructive and enslaving it is by word, picture, or video, in utter privacy, nobody looking at you to make you feel ewmbarassed, and without any limits on time or place.

There are now millions of pornographic sites available on the Net, and the opportunities are not only available 24/7—they are advertising themselves to anyone who is sitting in front of the screen, including children and young people who are one click away from stepping into the beginning of an addiction that can enslave, and corrupt, and destroy the spirit in you.

And when full blown addiction has you in it’s grip, you will not overcome it by yourself, and you deceive yourself if you think you can. Dear ones, those pictures and conversations and videos are little bits of hell that will replay in your mind until they have built a pattern of thinking from the dark side, from the pit of hell itself, that you cannot escape on your own.

That’s why Paul says “step into the light for Jesus’ sake!” Get clean with God… Get brutally honest before God so he can take these things and put them to death so that they no longer dominate you! It IS possible…I know that some of you have been trapped and defeated by this and you have prayed and you just feel there’s no hope. BUT THERE IS! There is hope if you get honest with yourself before God…that’s the first step.

The second step is to get honest before others. You and I need a place where accountability is high and anonymity is low; a fellowship of people struggling like we are, failing and getting back up, encouraging each other to press into Jesus and live for the promise and the vision of the life he wants to give us, and never to give up. We call that fellowship the church, where anonymity is low and loving gracious accountability is high—where in the company of others who struggle as we do we can call upon the exceptional and unrelenting power of Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit to give us the strength and the freedom to do what Paul says we must do:

But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips. Colossians 3:8 NIV

EX: my accountability board…

3. Get face-to-face with others

Remove our masks… (Illustr: scene 16, 59:20-1:01, Must Love Dogs)

Who wears a mask? I do—every time I try to convince people I have more compassion that I really do…everytime I tell a story about myself and embellish the facts a bit to make myself look better…everytime I try to deliberately hide the pride or vanity or just the stupid pettiness that’s inside of me… I wear a mask more often than I’d like to admit, and I bet you do too. All of us wear masks I order to project an image or hide who we are…

But here’s the tragedy: everytime we do that, we cut ourselves off from the ability to truly experience love. We may be able to get people to say nice things about us, we may be able to paper over relational disconnects just like the DVD we just saw—but the better we get at spinning, the better we get at wearing a mask, the lonelier and emptier we will feel inside. Because God has made us to be loved and known to the extent that we are willing to take off the masks and be known… and that’s exactly why Paul writes:

9 Don’t lie to one another. You’re done with that old life. It’s like a filthy set of ill-fitting clothes you’ve stripped off and put in the fire. Let’s read the rest together:
10 Now you’re dressed in a new wardrobe. Every item of your new way of life is custom-made by the Creator, with his label on it. All the old fashions are now obsolete.

Colossians 3:9-10 The Message

When you and I surrender our lives to Jesus Christ, he takes off the old wardrobe and puts on us a whole new set of clothes—a whole new way of relating to others. And we call it

loving each other as Christ loved people– face-to face!

The Gospels are full of stories of Jesus stopping dead in his tracks, turning around, taking people aside, physically touching the untouchables—in every way possible taking time to engage people face-to-face as he healed them, welcomed them, encouraged them, and invited them to follow him. Jesus loved people face-to-face

During the last two weeks of my time in Uganda, I was on a team with five other people—four of whom I had never met! And were going to spend 14 days, 24/7 with each other doing ministry in places we’d never been before. We had only ONE day to prepare—so what did we do? We spent the entire day in a room at the Namirembe Guest House in Kampala, face-to-face, sharing our lives, one by one…taking off the masks… Result: Kingdom ministry and friendships that will last a lifetime!

12 Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.
13 Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.
14 Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony.

Colossians 3:12-14 New Living Translation

Dear ones, you are not going to develop tenderhearted mercy behind a computer screen. Chat rooms will not develop your capacity for kindness, gentleness and patience. How can you develop kindness in isolation from others—or humility, or patience in isolation from people who are different from you? God created you and me to be I relationship with each other; loving, encouraging, challenging, serving, praying and caring for each other in EXACTLY the same way that Jesus modeled in the way he loved others.

You’re not going to find that in isolation from others. You’re only going to find it as you get deep with God first, as you get honest with him and others, and as you get face-to-face with other Christ followers who will help you along the way. If you don’t know where to start, take a look at the backside of your bulletin… and if we don’t have a group that meets, with a focus and a time and place for you, then please see me—we’ll start one!

Let me close with a quote from the beginning of the Bible, the beginning of creation, from Genesis 3:7… God was face-to-face with humankind when he breathed life into us. From the very beginning, we were made to be face to face with God, and face to face with each other.

So where is your face this morning? Where is your face turned? Are you hiding out behind a screen, or in the shadows of cyberspace…or are you ready to walk in the light as he is in the light… to have fellowship with God and each other…